DA SUSHIRRITO

why eat small cut up pieces of your favorite sushi roll when u can just eat it in a huge burrito form cauz MERICA. thats y lol. not sure who said fuck it one day and came up wit this but thanx its brilliant lol heres what we need

for da sticky rice

2.c short or meduim grain rice or sushi rice ( it can not be long grain or instant rice. it wont stick together)

3.c water

2.tbsp rice vinager

2.tbsp sugar

1.tbsp salt

for da roll

nori ( the seaweed sushi wrap stuff lol. found in the asian area at da store)

1 big package chunk style imitation crab

mayo

sirracha

1 cucumber

1 big carrot

2 avacodos

parchment paper

soy sauce. wasabi sake. wtf ever u like to eat sushi wit lol

k first thing we do is rinse da rice off by puttin it in a fine mesh strainer or sieve i think its called lol. rinse til the water runs clear from da rice mixin it wit yo hands. rice bags n boxes have lotta talc n shit sumtimes on da rice

now da rice is clean so well dump it into a pot n add the 3.c water n bring to a boil then cover n reduce heat to low n cook 15 min then turn off da heat n let sit covered for 10 min then well mix da vinager sugar n salt in a bowl til its all disolved n slowly add it to da rice by foldin it in so we dont mash up da rice. then well let it sit til its all cooled off n room temp n then well have our sushi rice which the word sushi means cold rice i think lol im pretty sure it dont mean raw fish but what ever im da last person who should try n have a thought lol so dont listen to me im drinkin lol

now as our rice cools down we can prep up da good stuff goin inside first well peel da rind off da cukes usin ….u guessed it a peeler. your good at this

after u strip it down cut it once in da center longways n run yo finger thru da middle of both sides to remove da seeds then cut em into long thin strips

then take da carrot and use da peeler n shave da crap outta it lol also length wise

n take da avacado n pop da pit scoop da good good out wit a spoon all at once n slice it into strips too or eat one rite quik shhhhhhhh

veggies are good to go so take da crab meat n chop it up into small chunks

now we gonna take 3 parts mayo n 1 part sirracha n mix that shit up

n boom. we got sirracha mayo. u can add more or less sirracha dependin on how hot u like it or buy it pre made but im poor folk n already have the 2 in my fridge soooo circle gets da square right duhh lol. oooooo n for da block too lol

now take yo fake crab n mix it in soo good just like this but if mayo or sirrach aint yo thing theres tons of alternatives u can come up wit like having a hot dog instead or pb n j lmfao. just kiddin. but ya u can hit da crab up wit ranch or sweet n sour sauce or no sauce or terriaky. u know what i said i dont use spell check this isnt gettin graded lol. but im sure u can figure out a flavor but my boys like it like this except one n he goes plain n no sauce but da choices are endless n this is just a blueprint im sure yall can figure out different variations for this like actual raw fish n different veggies n sauce. i wanna try it wit cream cheese lol. but k im off track stupid turkey lol lets proceed

now everythings ready to assemble so lets lay our nori out on a small sheet of parchment paper that well use to roll da rrito up. y it has 2 r’s i dont know lol. n well put a thin layer of rice down on it and it helps to have a bowl of water close by to dip yo fingers in to help keep da rice from stickin to u cause we be usin our hands. i.sound like a pirate lol. arrr

try to keep da rice just away from da edges on the longer sides so when we roll it the nori can meet clean n seal together k time to fill this bad boy place da goodies in da center

k now da tricky part. u dont need sum fancy bamboo sushi roller or any of that. just use da parchment paper n roll one side of da sushi so it evenly meets the other side n tuck it in then roll it so da seem is on da bottom. just try to meet up da nori to itself n keep it tight while rollin. and dab a wet finger along were the nori meets n itll seal da roll

now u got it rolled. wrap it in da parchment n put it in da fridge for awhile to cool then cut it in half n enjoy

n if u want wasabi at home u gotta get da powder stuff. that crap in a tube sucks. look to da asian markets for stuff like this a friend of mine found this for me. its just like da wasabi u get at sushi places real hot. sooo good